Adoption
Many people have a misleading idea about adoption. They have heard distressing stories about newborn babies being taken from their mothers’ arms and placed with strangers. Some wonder, “How could you go through life never knowing what happened to your child?” Adoption has changed significantly in the last twenty years. Today, you have the right to select your baby’s parents, meet them, and even maintain contact over the years. These changes have made considering adoption much easier.
There are many reasons to consider adoption. Perhaps you feel in your heart that you can’t provide the care your baby needs due to a lack of time, money, or support. Maybe you already have children, and adding another would be too much stress. Or, you might just be afraid and want to know more about this option.
The good news is that there are many loving couples who long to have a baby but can’t due to infertility. They are waiting for someone like you – someone willing to give a baby life and share that child with them. They aim to love both you and your baby and provide a strong, stable environment where your child can thrive.
Researching all your options is the right thing to do. If you feel unable to parent for any reason, adoption might be the right choice for you. Your local pregnancy center would be glad to refer you to several agencies in our area.
Frequently Asked Questions About Adoption:
What does adoption cost?
Adoption is free for you. Your local pregnancy center can refer you to agencies that will assist you without charge. Many agencies also work with adoptive parents to cover all your pregnancy-related expenses.
Can I choose a family for my baby?
Yes! Most agencies offer a range of families for you to choose from. These families have been thoroughly screened and approved. You also have options like choosing a friend or someone recommended to you.
How often will I see my baby after birth and after adoption?
You can have as much contact with your baby at the hospital as you wish. When planning your child’s adoption, you can opt for an open adoption plan with ongoing visits, a semi-open adoption with updates through letters and pictures, or a confidential plan with no contact.
Tell me more about open adoption:
With an open adoption plan, you can:
- Meet potential adoptive families before deciding.
- Exchange information (names and addresses) with the adoptive family at the appropriate time.
- Have ongoing contact, including attending the birth, physician visits, home visits, and family gatherings.
- Directly correspond and contact each other by telephone.
What’s a “semi-open” adoption plan?
In a semi-open plan, you choose a family from non-identifying material provided by the agency.
- An agency or third party mediates contact before and after birth.
- You will know the adoptive family by their first names only.
- Adoptive parents may attend the birth and meet you beforehand.
- All correspondence goes through the agency or third party.
- Post-placement meetings are arranged and supervised by the mediator.
- Adoptive parents often share the child’s photos, letters, and occasionally gifts or videos.
How soon after birth can my baby go to the parents I choose?
The timing depends on your preferences, legal aspects of adoption (which vary by state), and the cooperation of the birthfather. Many women opt for their baby to be placed directly with the adoptive family from the hospital, but you may choose temporary care while considering adoption.
How much will my child know about me?
This depends on the type of adoption you choose – open, semi-open, or confidential. Regardless, agencies typically encourage you to provide your complete medical and social history for your child, which is a requirement in some states.
Does the birthfather have any rights?
Both you and the birthfather have rights. If there is disagreement about adoption or you are no longer in a relationship with him, the agency will work with the birthfather and/or the courts to determine if his rights can be terminated.
Can my child find me if they want to search someday?
State laws dictate when your child may access information in the adoption file.
In Conclusion
Adoption is a profound and life-changing decision, both for you and your child. It’s a journey of love, courage, and sometimes, sacrifice. At your local pregnancy center, they understand the complexities and emotions involved in this choice. They are here to support you with compassion, respect, and confidentiality, every step of the way.
Remember, you are not alone in this journey. Their team is dedicated to providing you with all the information and assistance you need to make the best decision for your and your baby’s future. They will connect you with resources, counseling, and agencies that align with your wishes and values.
Choosing adoption can be an act of immense love and bravery. It can provide your child with a life full of opportunities and a loving family, while also respecting your life circumstances and plans. Whatever decision you make, know that it is yours to make, and pregnancy centers are there to support you in making an informed and empowered choice.
For more information, to discuss your options, or to get connected with resources, please don’t hesitate to reach out. Your story matters, and they are here to listen and help.
Frequently Asked Questions
Question: Do I need an appointment?
Answer: Walk-ins are welcome. However, it is best to make an appointment to minimize your office wait time.
Question: What is the cost?
Answer: All services are free and confidential.
Question: What should I expect when I come for my visit?
Answer: Upon your arrival, a friendly receptionist will guide you to meet your client advocate. This advocate will offer you a judgment-free space to talk, followed by essential information and a pregnancy test. In the event of a positive test result, a dedicated medical professional will perform a limited ultrasound to verify the pregnancy's viability and estimate the age of the fetus.
Question: How long after sex does it take for a pregnancy test to work and how accurate is the test?
Answer: Pregnancy tests can be performed 7 to 10 days after conception. A client with a negative result may be invited to return within 2 weeks for a repeat test if she has not had her period.
If you have taken a home pregnancy test, you may want to confirm results with a laboratory-quality test at your local pregnancy center. These pregnancy tests detect HCg levels within 7 to 10 after conception.
Question: Will you tell anyone about my visit?
Answer: Pregnancy centers maintain a rigorous privacy and confidentiality policy. Clients' information is safeguarded against unauthorized disclosure, respecting their right to privacy, except in instances mandated by law. This includes situations necessary for public health, preventing harm to the client or others, or in specific circumstances where the use or disclosure of information is justified without prior consent, such as in cases of abuse reporting or suicide/homicide prevention.
Question: When should I schedule an appointment?
Answer: High-quality, medical-grade pregnancy tests are capable of detecting pregnancy from the first day after your initial missed period. We advise scheduling an appointment if you've missed a period, have any queries related to pregnancy, or suspect that you might be pregnant.
Question: How far along do I have to be to get a free ultrasound?
Answer: After an initial consultation with a client advocate, many pregnancy centers offer on-site ultrasound scans. These limited ultrasounds are conducted by a licensed nurse sonographer or a registered diagnostic medical sonographer (RDMS) and are subsequently reviewed by a licensed physician. The purpose of an ultrasound is to confirm the viability of the pregnancy and to establish the gestational age.
Question: I already know I'm pregnant and I want an abortion, what's next?
Answer: It is advisable to have an ultrasound to confirm the viability of your pregnancy and to ensure it is located within the uterus, as 20% to 25% of pregnancies end in miscarriage. Moreover, the ultrasound helps in determining the stage of your pregnancy, which is essential in making an informed decision about the type of abortion procedure you may consider. Many pregnancy centers offer a limited ultrasound free of charge.
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